Thursday, January 27, 2011

Help me

I woke up at six this morning to Cynthia screaming she was downstairs carving some symbol into her arm- how did she find the knives I hid them- she was crying and crying and crying and

I thought I saw something behind her but when I blinked the shadow was gone. I stopped her from hurting herself and cleaned her up, but when I tried to call the hospital, police, someone the phones were dead. I don't know why the internet is working. Cynthia is in the fetal position and mumbling about it being time to go and she doesn't want to leave without me.

I...when I tried to leave the house to take her myself, I blacked out. Cynthia apparently pulled me back inside because I collapsed on the front steps. Every single time I go near the front or back door, or even a window, my head starts to hurt so much it feels like I'm going to start bleeding from my ears.

I know you all will say I should have listened or something. But what was I supposed to believe? It's been less than a week and I'm trapped in my own house with a daughter who may try to hurt herself or me, and apparently some psycho-something is coming to kill us both or take my daughter away. I don't think...I'm not sure if I'm going to be alive by tomorrow. God I'm starting to cry, wonderful. What a great mom I am. If I die, I need you all...I think that Cynthia might live. She made it back the first time from whatever happened and I think she can do it again. So if I die, please promise me to look for her. Find her, help her, take her away from whatever this person or thing is.

The signal is shrinking- shit, I don't have much time.

Thank you for everything



  1. ....Posts like this make me so angry I snap to calm.

    We'll find her. And you. We have to.

  2. if i don't want you to find me, you won't find me.

    ava the librarian. He's not happy with you. stay away from Mommy.

  3. I'll bet he hates me sweetie.